6) The Hands Free Lover
What’s the point of putting your phone on speaker and standing the other side of the room? It sounds as though you are speaking to a family member. We are only going to say ‘hello’ so many times before we assume you don’t wish to speak to us and we hang up. We’re in a busy call centre. It’s noisy. If you’re on speaker phone we can’t hear you.
7) The Frog
Also commonly called the Croaker or the Horse. Please don’t phone us if you need to clear your throat. We wear headsets so the sound of you clearing your throat is magnified and deafening. We are not paid to have our eardrums burst. And trust me it hurts our ears. I have often had to remove my headset because of this. I can’t hear or help you if you force me to remove my headset. Simple as that.
8) The Free Thinker
We are not paid to make your decisions for you. Too many customers phone in and ask us what’s best for them, or what should they do. People need to think for themselves. We don’t know what insurance your property needs. We don’t know what other insurance you may already have. So there’s no point in asking us ‘is it covered under my home insurance?’ How are we supposed to know? We are not mind readers. We sell insurance. It is not a call centre where you can ring and someone will make a decision for you. Do your own thinking. Try reading the documents we send out. Try reading the documents you have from other companies.
9) The Masquerader
Don’t pretend to be someone else. Not only is it annoying it’s also illegal. You may be phoning on behalf of an elderly relative but saying that you are them and that you are the policy holder, when you are not, is illegal. It is a criminal offence. You are, in effect, stealing someone’s identity, never mind committing fraud. If we find out that you are doing this, and the actual real person is not there, then you will be cut off. No doubt about it. We will end the call immediately.
10) The Upper Cut
There’s at least one person per day who thinks that they are better than we are. You can hear it in their voice as soon as we answer the phone. They often incorporate several of the aforementioned as well as speaking to us with a very obvious air of pomposity. They have their favourite phrases, such as, ‘Just get on with it.’ Or ‘I don’t need you tell me all that. I know it already.’ We invariably tell them something they don’t know. They then jump on us as if we have no right telling them the facts. They should just remember that they are phoning us because they want our help with something. Not the other way round.
These are but a few of the annoying types who phone us. Of course they don’t make up the whole of our customers. Luckily. Many of the people who phone us are really nice, friendly and intelligent. Most of the time we can have a laugh and a joke with the customer.